Well that's how I look at dating -sort of.
I'm sick of people saying, "Well if I had the job..." "If you gave me the job..." "...then I would do this and this and that and the other thing and MAN! I'd be doing SO many things! Buuuut, if you're not going to give me the job then you can fuck off."
I'm sick of guys talking a big game like, "Well if we dated I'd do this and that, but since we're not I see no point." Well guys, don't you think that kind of shows your character? You'll only do things for people if you get what you want in return, or at least something out of it.
Me, I helped move a girl who was decently new at my place of work out of her abusive husband's when I had a test to study for, because helping her and her children was more important than doing well on my test. -Lucky for me karma was like, "Hey, that was a nice thing you did! I'm going to have the professor let you use your book on this one test!" I spent my Thanksgiving with my friend 6 hours out of town so she could be near her boys just in case they needed her instead of spending it with the guy I liked at the time.
Guys -not friends- fine. I took a night off from homework and went to the guys house who I was dating who lived super far out of town from me. I also stopped by his school one day to chat after my daughter's practice. I invited him out to my daughter's sports events. Another guy, I offered to drive an hour of of town to see him twice, but he declined both times. I bought him his own towel for my place since he was so much bigger than me.
My point is, don't wait until you ARE her boyfriend or until you two ARE dating to be sweet and thoughtful. And if she says no at first, especially because she thinks that you don't really care about her, then just take a little time to not be with anyone else because you don't want just anybody, you want her.
If you two are already talking every day and you're already supportive of her [and hopefully she of you too] then what's to stop her from wanting to keep that up and keep you around.
DO NOT CONFUSE THIS!!!!
Do not confuse this with acting like a friend and then slipping your way into the BOYfriend zone. DO NOT DO THIS!!! Girls WILL friend-zone guys. Make it known that you like her, but if she needs time or space, then give her that. Reassure her that you still like her -unless she's made it CLEAR that you two are just friends.
And even at that, if you two are just friends, you don't have to be a dick. You don't have to stop talking to her and being sweet and such. One of my best friends and I treat each other like we're freaking married. We'll never EVER date, but that doesn't mean we're dicks to each other. We still go out to eat together, talk for hours, do laundry together, help each other out with kids and family stuff, and advice and such.
Point is....
You shouldn't wait until she says "let's date" before you start being a great guy. You should already be a great guy -that's who the girls fall for. We're always watching....and we talk. So if you're a dick before or after a girl, she'll tell her friends and they'll tell their friends and so on and so forth and then you're fucked!! Be a great guy all the time. Even if she's a bitch. -ESPECIALLY if she's a bitch. Then everyone will see how great you are and what a biatch she is and that'll get you EVEN FARTHER with future girls.
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